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I am happy for my friend I am, but at the same time, things have been different
ever since she had a boyfriend.
I am not even remotely jealous, just sad and nostalgic over the past.
I love her so much,she 's so wonderfulller haha, she's such a dork
and
she's gorgeous, and she doesn't even know it. That makes her even more gorgeous to me.
So of course she would have a boyfriend...
I mean at the beginning of the year; I loved the fact that we both had never had boyfriends
and we were 16 years old! Ha, we were different from many people. That is one of the things that made us bond so well. We understood each-other so much.
We still do, but when I tried in a way to explain to her how I was feeling, she didn't understand...she didn't say, but I knew.
I feel like yet another person has left me behind, I do not even want a boyfriend, not yet. Everyone is growing up faster...and you knwo what?
I am in no rush.
I miss her, we do not really talk as much, she is always hanging out with her boyfriend.
This is why I do get close to people because I always get attached,I love so hard ,and something always happen where
our friendship ends,or just fades for some reason.
And now lately I am kind of driftign away from her, and it is only cause I do not want to get hurt, she is probally thinking I am mad at her, but I am not.
I still do want to be friends....that is part of what friendship is..working at it through hardtimes,but I depise the feeling that I am putting more effotr into it than
the pther person.That i care and love the person more than they do me.
Ha this is part of life,I know it, but still it is hard.
Ha, just imagine what I will be like with a boyfriend; I am way too attached....I need to get myself together, before I have a boyfriend....later in life...not now.
At least I have my family....=] haha unconditional love right there.
someday, someone will love me just as hard as I do them
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